Shaadi Ke Laddoo: He Thought I Was After His Money; 'I Am Wary Of Gold Diggers'

This special series is for every desi kid who has experienced the circus of meeting one rishta (proposal of marriage) after another, arranged by family members, only to end up disappointed, and perhaps, amused. This week's story is a about a girl who started talking to professionally successful guy, who called her a gold digger.
married

(Photo: iStock)

I connected with a guy over messages after my father shared my number. He had connected with the boy’s father who had shown interest first. He was doing well professionally as a venture capitalist in Dubai and had completed his MBA from one of the elite B-schools in India.
I was 34, and he was two years older than me. Initially, I wasn’t interested when he started messaging me, but he was intelligent and had a way with words. He was keen to get married, and for some reason, his enthusiasm was infectious. He made me download BOTIM because WhatsApp wouldn’t work in Dubai. He kept calling and messaging me throughout the day. I had many apprehensions about him, including the fact that he was vegetarian while I ate non-vegetarian food. Despite this, I started becoming infatuated and was even willing to turn vegetarian.
But then, it seemed the chase was over for him as soon as I started giving him attention and expecting his calls. Suddenly, after making sure I was ready to marry him and that he would be coming to India to plan things out, he asked me about my past. Specifically, he wanted to know if I ever had a boyfriend. Although I didn’t owe anyone an explanation about my ex-boyfriend, which didn’t work out, he made it seem like it was cool and that we should be honest about it. He also said he would tell me about his ex-girlfriend.
I told him about my past and how it didn’t work out. He acted very nonchalant and shared his own story about his ex-girlfriend. But then something changed. His calls became less frequent, and one day, while I was talking to him, he said he couldn’t marry me.
I was hurt, and then he said the most unexpected thing: “I don’t want to marry spoiled goods. It’s so easy for girls to have boyfriends, and when they reach their thirties, they want to marry a rich guy. I am wary of gold-diggers.” I was shocked and hurt that I chose to trust this man, and this is what I got in return.
His father had called my dad a few days later to ask for an update and if we had been talking to each other. My father told him that we aren't since we had a disagreement and argument. That's when his father said to my dad, "I apologize on his behalf. He has had arguments and fights over the phone with other women he connected with for marriage as well. It's always the same pattern."
    TN Lifestyle Desk author

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